Thank you for your interest in becoming a part of the Great Burial Grounds at Giza. We regret to inform you that your request for a building permit has been denied. Our local building code clearly states the need for each proposed burial structure to be a minimum of 200 cubits in height. In the interest of catering to the less privileged pharoahs, we have added an exception for hooded cat-men. We invite you to resubmit at any time. Signed, the Tombowner’s Association at the Great Burial Grounds at Giza. If you died here, you’d be home by now.
We admit that it was a bureaucratic oversight not to include provisions in our codes to expressly forbid the inclusion of sexually explicit images literally all over the facade of a building. We can only appeal to your better sensibilities as a husband and father.
Please see section IV.VIII of the Romans with Disabilities Act Accessibility Guidlines (RDAAG 94) concerning ramps. The ramps leading from the holding pens to the performance area are far too steep for disabled slaves to comfortably navigate. The spirit of the law is to provide the same right to life for all Romans, including the right to be torn limb from limb by wild beasts for the entertainment of moneyed nobles. Since plumbing codes won’t be invented for a few hundred years, I have no legal way of enforcing this final suggestion: toilets. With a capacity of 50,000, I would strongly recommend the inclusion of some facilities.
Tower of Pisa
I suspect your soils report to be a forgery. The report is signed “Leonardo P. Dirtman”, which is not the name of any qualified site engineer in our records. Under “primary soil makeup”, he wrote “definitely something hard, like rocks. Lots of rocks”. Under “additional information”, he voluntarily offered, somewhat suspiciously, “this tower will not tilt or lean, I mean it”. Please revise and resubmit.All photos used in this post are used under the creative commons license The photo of the Pyramids is from Bruno Girin’s photostream on Flickr The photo of the Kandariya Mahadeva is from brian.gatwicke’s photostream on Flickr The photo of the Colosseum is from njj4’s photostream on Flickr The photo of the Tower of Pisa is from kelvin_luffs’ photostream on Flickr